Taffy is one of the only nicknames I have picked up over the years. (Well, besides "la bruja" (the witch) which my darling high-school students call me - but that’s another story.) Some of my siblings call me Taffy - I guess it originally stemmed from difficulty pronouncing a K.
Lately this nickname has taken on a new meaning for me.
I remember walking through the mall when I was younger - and always stopping to watch the taffy-pulling machine in the candy shop just outside of ZCMI. The taffy was stretched between two big metal bars and then when it was stretched as far as it would go, another metal arm would hit right in the middle and pull the taffy in another direction.
This week I feel like taffy - pulled painfully in too many different directions at the same time. Too many people with claim on my time and energy.
There’s a great line in The Fellowship of the Ring where Bilbo describes himself as "old":
I know I don't look it, but I'm beginning to feel it in my heart.
I feel thin, sort of stretched, like butter, scraped over too much bread.
I need a holiday. A very long holiday.
Now, while I would never dream of describing myself as thin - physically - every day I feel a little thinner emotionally and mentally. It gets harder and harder to cope with unexpected crises when you are already at maximum stress load. You’re stretched as far as you can go and suddenly from out of nowhere a big metal bar comes flying in and streches you off in a different direction.
Scene opens on Taffy frantically multi-tasking; grading tests, cleaning her school room, counseling stressed-out kids, planning next week’s lessons, looking for lost CDs, etc.
Enter the first "metal bar" ...
Darling Students: "We can’t make it to the 4 hour AP practice test you are doing on Saturday morning, can you do it on Friday too?"
Taffy: "Sure!"
Sister Jones: "Can you teach the Young Women’s lesson on Sunday. Oh and you need to drop off 4-generation sheets to each of them to get filled out before Sunday."
Taffy: "Sure."
Neighbor: "Could you please do something with the knee-high field of dandelions that passes as your front yard. They keep blowing onto my perfectly manicured golf-green and contaminating it"
Taffy: "Sure." (I currently don’t even OWN a lawnmower, but I think I have a pair of garden clippers. I’ll see what I can do.)
Parent: "We want our child that has only come to class once in the last three weeks to get totally caught up this weekend. Can you re-teach him everything he needs to know?"
Taffy: "Sure?"
Principal: "Oh, by the way, did I tell you that you have to have a complete description of everything you teach all year in every class handed in by Monday?"
Taffy: "Aargh!"
Hey, wait a minute! I am Tangent Woman - this should be easy for me.
Oh, no! Someone must have discovered my Kryptonite.
I need a holiday. A very long holiday. :P
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9 comments:
I think the word "Sure" is your kryptonite! You poor girl. I used to have the same problem, until I cultivated a seemingly incurable condition called Egomania. It makes all the difference, really. Much easier to say no to people when you've decided that you're the centre of the universe.
Seriously, it's all about balance. I don't think that's something we can learn from someone else, or from a book or DVD. It's a matter of trial and error, and mostly error (which is why we get so discouraged sometimes). The trick is to not give up trying just because it's such a steep learning curve, you know?
Wow, this is such an awesome post. I love the taffy metaphor. You'd better not count this as your one post for the month. I want more!
I remember that taffy machine outside ZCMI; I can picture the arm slapping down on the pulled candy - yanking it off in another direction. Let's see if we continue the comparison...maybe you're getting all shiney and chewy in the process?
I'm sorry about all the stress. Hopefully after the AP tests your life will calm down to only Major Overload instead of Total Meltdown. Tell your neighbor that a preference for the weed known as grass over the weed known as dandelions is purely arbitrary and has no legally, morally or socially redeeming significance. So there!
Awesome description. Funny and sad at the same time. Mr. Ajax used to feel the same way about our dandelions. It's all in the eye of the beholder.
Remember, too that taffy is sweet, Taffy.
Maybe you should buy some taffy, attach a little paper to it that says "You are pulling me a direction I really don't want to go." and hand to the "intruder" with the instruction "Chew on this while I contemplate my answer."
Hang on for 3 weeks and then look forward to August (lying on your air mattress in the mountains under a clear sky watching a meteorite shower with your dogs by your side.
Does that relax you at all?
Great post!
I'll share the tool that I've learned to use after years of being pulled all different directions and an overzealous tendency to say "Yes!"
Boss/Mentor: "Hey, can you come help me at my seminar on Thursday? Oh, and no I can't pay you anything yet, it's team building."
Me: (outloud to boss) "I'm sorry, I have plans... (inside my own head) ..not to do that for you!"
Ward Choir Director who thinks choosing songs with a high G for a choir with 2 sopranos is acceptable: "Are you staying for choir today?"
Me: (outload to her) "I'm sorry, I have plans... (inside my own head) not to do that today!"
Well-meaning friend: "Hey, do you want to go to the 3rd Saturday dance this week?" - the one that is sadly reminiscent of junior high dances that I oddly don't want to subject myself to 25+ years later.
Me: (outloud to her) "I'm sorry, I have plans... (inside my own head) not to do that with you!"
You'd be surprised at how many people don't question when you simply say you have plans without offering any sort of explanation.
Hang in there! Summer vacation is just around the corner....and for that I'm sure you'll have lots of plans - even if they're plans of what not to do!
Though I am not currently teaching, when I was teaching I put everything I had into all my lessons. I usually taught writing, which took much more time to prepare for and correct than other subjects. I would stay up into the wee hours of the night and spend weekends working on a stack of essays or journals, making sure I thoroughly explained all the feedback that I thought would help them be better writers. Then they wouldn't follow it. I don't know any other way to be a teacher than to put my whole soul into it.
You are crazy, it is true, but you are a great teacher because you do what you do. It seems sometimes that being a great teacher and being sane just can't go together, unless you are the Master Teacher, who could do everything right. So keep up the great work because you are great.
dearest senorita,
you are definitely a laffy taffy. and i love you!
love, liz.
ps: how do you make an enyay again? (please pardon my outrageous spelling. :S )
Good for people to know.
OK, I'm so glad you commented on mine, because now I can lurk on yours!!!! Do you remember when I called you to tell you I was pg with Austin (you were the first BTW), and now he is off at BYU-I. Freaky!!!! I love you Taffy, and wish I was there to help relieve your stress and you could do the same for me. Maybe we could lay in bed and sing all the hymns one by one. Then, your blanket would catch on fire from the space heater....
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